I heard this line in a couple of days ago and it's rolling around in the back of my brain.
We are a social animal, and we need other people to make us who we are. Listen to this great podcast about "attachment," which Susan Johnson believes will be the most influential psychological theory of the new century. It stands opposed to behaviorism (ie. Pavlov's dogs) and Freudian psychoanalysis (ie. Oedipus et al).
As Johnson says early on, it's basically a theory of love, but the man who came up with it couldn't call it that because he would have been ridiculed. Teaching public school, we heard a lot of mumblings about "attachment disorders" - students who couldn't trust anyone, were oppositional, and didn't know how to interact with others in a positive way. The research backing attachment theory shows that babies who don't get proper emotional nurturing don't develop properly, either emotionally or intellectually.
So, now we've reached the point where science is beginning to put names and theories on our intuitions - that mothers and babies need lots of time together, that every human needs other emotional connections, whether 7 years old or 75. Until we abandon the ridiculous macho notion that we are better off doing everything for ourselves, we will continue to flounder as a group.
This ties into much of what I think about New Brunswickers - we're very geographically isolated from one another. And when you go to meetings (if you're lucky enough to be on a committee) it takes forever, because people aren't really there to conduct business. They're there to enjoy each other's company and to remember they're not alone in this world.
2 comments:
The podcast link wasn't specific enough-it's under "Ideas" and it's called "Hold Me Tight."
This podcast was really great. As I grow older and hopefully wiser, I'm starting to understand that part of coming full circle as an adult is to be able to truly accept who you are as a person, your needs, your aspirations, your imperfections, and the fact that more often than not, you need other people on your life journey. It's interesting to see that science is devoting time to understanding and proving that this is not weakness, but a basic human need. Very cool and interesting, thanks for the link!
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